the ovenlight saga
The Ovenlight Saga:
Baking Dough - Part 1
A clean & funny retelling of 'Twilight'
When it comes to making fun of Twilight, this laugh-out-loud adaptation of your favorite vampire romance saga has everything you could EVER want! (except for swear words and smut - who needs that, right?)
Is there BLOOD? YES.
Is there baseball? OF COURSE!!
Are there ridiculously silly puns of movie lines? WAY TOO MANY TO COUNT!!
Tedwin Collins and his family members (Carlo, Escusme, Alith, Jackson, Dimmitt & Rose) reside under Witness Protection in the small town of Ports, Oregon - playing baseball & running their Italian ice cream franchise, Cold Skin Creamery.
Everything is going fine until a girl named Portabella Schwann moves into town, a girl who has something strange running through her veins.
Tedwin doesn’t know if he can have a friendship - or any kind of relationship - with this mysterious, new girl...but Alith sees that her mind-reading brother and Ella have a future together, in spite of the Collins family’s secret, dangerous past and Ella’s love of something that’s forbidden on their “special diet".
Jason Dark-Grey, Ella’s childhood best friend (bestest and BUFFEST), is keeping secrets, too, and learning the truth about both of them will change her life - and ALL of theirs - FOREVER!!
What makes Tedwin’s throat burn like a white-hot branding iron?
What was the terrible fate of Mr. Fluffkins, the chinchilla?
How does Ella find out she was born to be an umpire?
What mythical creature has Jason been running around the woods as?
The answer to these burning questions and more is what you will have to read to find out! Whether you loved Twilight or hated it, and you're a fan of comedy like The Goldbergs, The Princess Bride, Encino Man, Spaceballs, Monty Python, The Office, Parks & Rec or Brooklyn 9-9, this parody will definitely make you laugh!
"It's like Twilight and The Princess Bride had a baby - but not a creepy one."
"I was laughing so hard I was crying! Crap! My mascara!"
@roadtriprenee
"You're going to love it! I've seen it!"
@doesno_onehavevision
"I laughed out loud I don't know how many times! Chapter 6 is utterly ridiculous in the BEST way!!! All in all this was a really fun read!"
Cassie B. - Texas
THANK YOU for bringing this absolute ✨️GEM✨️ into this world!!! I have never had a book make me actually laugh out loud!...It had all my favorite references from all movies in one! I think Stefanie definitely hit the nail on the head with making a way better parody then Vampires Suck and she did it without crude/raunchy scenes and no curse words. This seriously needs to get picked up and made into a movie! Thank you Stefanie Mellor for fighting cancer to bring us this masterpiece. We appreciate you and what you bring to the world of Twilight. I cannot wait for part two!"
Ashlyn R. - Illinois
